Long distance LOVE! Or is it 'distance long' LOVE?

"Distances grow fondness among people." Now haven't we heard this a million times before.
Well, indeed it does create fondness (of course, with "it" refering to distance here!) but in the process it takes a toll of emotions, efforts, time, energy and many times (lemme add usually here also) tears to keep it going.
But me no 'guru' of relationships. Rather am myself a victim and member of the Long Distance Club.

I guess people are right when they say that men are from mars and women are from Venus. 'We' are so different in every way.
Apart from being different biologically, we are different to a great extent in the way we think and the issues which hold great importance for me may be a normal or even a non-issue for my partner (and usually there are NO vice versa in such cases!).

Of course, how dare I disturb him when he is at work!! "I am busy. I have work. We will talk when I get back home." A normal response which is easy to live with and handle if you meet everyday or at least stay in the same city. But what happens when you are trying to measure the relationship thousands of kilometers on the globe?

And how can I forget the time factor? No am not mentioning the vices of different time zones in line with the GMT. Rather, my partner and I work in different time zones. I start early and finish early while he starts late and finishes late. Thus, his "free time" is usually well past my sleep time.
It's like when one is free to talk, the other one would be snoring and vice versa. When I want my partner to come online or talk on phone, he is either sleeping or at work and ultimately either I stay awake till late waiting for him to come talk or wait for the weekends when we can chit-chat without an interruption. What pain!

Chatting or email might sound as a substitute for phone calls but it is surely not. The tone, language and intensions can be often misinterpreted and in fact that's exactly what happens. But then being a little diplomatic on emails is much better than being answerable for looooooong phone bills. And phones? What can I say for them?

The time you call, you are more worried about keeping the phone down thinking about the mounting telephone bill and at the same time you end up discontented and unhappy for not being able to express what you really wanted to.

There are surely times when one starts remembering all the good moments spent together and the next thing is you pick up your phone and start dialing. But what if your partner doesn't answer. You end up being unhappy and upset, a clear case of MUS - "Missing U Syndrome" (I read about this one a while ago!).

To sum it, TRUST is the key in any relationship but it is the "most" important thing in long distance relationship. It is like a stone on which the relationship rests. It can make thousands of miles seem like just a phone call away.

A huge list of things including phone calls, letters, cards, gifts, sweet messages, voicemails, SMS, emails, chats and so on are needed to keep a long distance relationship alive and kicking. And one should always remember, Distance is not the end of the world in a relationship. Rather at many times it's the beginning and a strong one. How? Well, I said in the beginning, "Distances grow fondness among people". And trust me…it surely does!!!

Main Jahaan Rahoon, Main Kahin Bhi Rahoon...

Main Jahaan Rahoon, Main Kahin Bhi Rahoon...
song from the hindi flick Namastey London (2007)

A real heart-rendering song and salute to Javed Akhtar for penning it and Himesh Reshmaiyaa its music composition.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=awqw_ym91ua

Here are the lyrics:
(main jahaan rahoon main kahin bhi hoonteri yaad saaath hai) - 2
kisi se kahoon
ke nahi kahoon yeh jo dil ki baat hai
kehne ko saath apane ek duniya chalti hai per chhupke is dil mein tanhaayi palti hai
bas yaad saath hai teri yaad saaath hai - 3

main jahaan rahoonmain kahin bhi hoon
teri yaad saaath hai
kahin to dil mein yaadon ki
ek suli gad jaati hai
kahin har ek tasveer bhahut hi dhundhali pad jati hai
koi nayi duniya ke naye rango mein khush rehta hai
koi sab kuch paake bhi yeh mann hi mann kehta hai
kehne ko saath apane ek duniya chalti hai per chhupke is dil mein tanhaayi palti hai
bas yaad saath hai teri yaad saaath hai - 3

kahin to beete kal ki jade in dil mein hi utar jaati hai
kahin jo dhage tute to malaayen bhikar jaati
koi dil mein jagah nayi, baaton ke liye rakhta hai
koi apni palko par yaadon ke diye rakhta hai
kehne ko saath apane ek duniya chalti hai per chhupke is dil mein tanhaayi palti hai
bas yaad saath hai teri yaad saaath hai - 3

Its a whole new world!

'It's a whole new world...'
This OST from the animated Disney production Aladdin now comes as a complete new meaning to me. Life has changed after being married. Yes its normal, as people tell me, but sincerely going through it is quite a roller coaster at the moment.
I am in a long distance marriage (which is at over 2,000 km distance) and just too difficult to handle especially when living with punju in-laws. I will accept (rather sheepishly) that I do not feel being married at times, and rather having shifted to some PG accomodation in a strange land where I of all people around me must wear odd clothing/make up and just eat anything and everything made of desi ghee (& if you don't understand what's that, you are in a great state of affairs)!
Suddenly, I have begun comparing things/lifestyle/etc between my parents' household and this new place. Things come to mind like, how it was there -- getting up late on holidays, few responsibilities, little pressure, ease in life/lifestyle, etc (must stop here coz the list is seemingly endless!).
On a positive side, my hubby and I cherish every moment we spend together -- its quality time! We hate quabbling over anything and just steer away lest wasting time together.